Fake NHS glasses

There's more than one reason Bieber needs a slap

There was a time I remember - let's call it the golden age - when kids weren't ashamed to mock one another without the fear of facing a lawsuit. Fat kids would be called 'chunk', short kids 'stumpy' and kids with glasses 'specky'. It's the last of these which brings to attention the latest addition to the list: idiot hipsters and their desire to wear fake NHS-style glasses.

That cheery old soul Morrisey is perhaps the most famous face to have adorned these oh-so-sexy spectacles. But now, cool kids with turn-ups, stupid hats and deck shoes have decided that NHS-style glasses are the latest must-have accessory.

Is it just me or does wearing glasses not mean that there is something wrong with your eyes? Ergo, people wearing glasses for no reason is, well, mocking the afflicted in a way that goes further than name calling. Perhaps next they'll decide to walk everywhere on crutches and visit hospitals to show off how cool they can be: "Hey guys, don't worry about losing that leg. Check out how awesome you can make your crutches look. See here, I've added some lyrics from my favourite Plan B song."

It's always been said that you shouldn't hit someone wearing glasses. I think that, as long as you know they're a douchebag wearing fake glasses, you've a right to pound your fist into their face as many times as you see fit. Pissing on their trilby hat is advised also.